Random Ideas

Live @ 5am

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Live @ 5am

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I was graced with the opportunity to not only recall, but also record on digital paper, a game I played in dream-state. Tuesday. Early morning. Woken up by the urge ‘to go to the washroom’, or as my Google Assistant would fail to transcribe “crucibles to Washington”. Just prior to that I was in a semi-conscious state recounting  a game that I’m playing with three other people at some undisclosed location. Like in many other dreams before, nothing new to me. I’m fairly lucid throughout my dream and picked up on the fact that this seemed like a pretty cool game. As I felt myself becoming conscious and my bladder now forcing my hand I quickly started to recap how the game looked and how it was played. This experience may be common for some of you, and if so you know how it usually goes. As my brain tries to cram abstract concepts to my frontal lobe a lot of details were missed. Kind of like jamming a peeled melon into a coffee cup, only so much will be retained. Odd analogy, but we’ll go with that for now. Of the information I happened to retain simple concepts like game pieces and board layout were pretty definitive. Basic concepts like game mechanics and order of play weren’t so memorable. I had to do a little thinkering.

 

Down the rabbit hole

Down the rabbit hole

For me, game-inspired dreams are still somewhat of a mystery. I can understand the why but I’m still figuring out the how. I still can’t pinpoint when. I’m always thinking of creative mechanisms in applications. High-level concepts for everyday things and everyday experiences. It’s not just for game design but creativity in general. That morning’s dream-state recital began roughly around 5:45 a.m. I kept on trying to remember the look and sequence of play over and over while in the washroom. Then quickly bolted back to my nightstand to grab my phone and started creating notes. I went straight to a notepad and my stylus took helm. I started drawing out what I remembered. Sometimes a few scribbled lines here and there were worth a paragraph of incoherent (and often misspelled) text. As I drew, I started to remember more concepts of game play and, eventually through the art of interpretation, started to construct game mechanics that made sense to the draft. Then designer divergence kicked in and I was literally of two minds on how to tackle this concept. From there it was an hour sitting on my bedside, in the darkness of the morn, cramming as much ideas from my head into little notes on my phone. Welcome to my life.

StemGen

So what’s next?

Curse these hands for not drawing, typing or moving fast enough to keep up with my brain. Or, curse my brain for moving too fast for my hands or words to express such wonders. Yes, I could keep audio notes but I find sometimes they are filled with gaps of incoherent babble. I’ve done it in the past and I often use it when I find writing takes too long. Or sometimes after saying something the idea changes and I have to remit the previous thought. I usually voice-to-text my notes so I can control what’s said, taking breaks at punctuations and adjusting on the fly. Speaking softly so I don’t disturb my wife proves to be a challenge sometimes so I just go sit on the toilet lid or in the office. Pfft. Going back to bed? I wish. Brain is now almost at full throttle. Blessing and a curse, I tell you. If these game concepts ever take off expect a DevLog for them. I do really like the ideas. They may even reach my Game a Week campaign I’m running over on my FB page. Ciao for now.

Designer Divergence

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Designer Divergence

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Oh why, oh why can’t I ever finish a single thought?! I have a couple theories.

1. Every idea is golden

This is a straight up fallacy that a lot of people share. Especially the creative and artistic type. New ideas come through every minute. I can easily switch between reading about literal rocket science to how beer is made, then find some odd pattern somewhere, then get an idea to design an trick taking game where astronauts take tricks from 99 bottles of beer in a rocket ascending into space. There! New awesome idea. Yeah… No. The feeling that an idea is unique and fresh is the illusion that it’s golden. Like everything else it starts out unpolished. Time and effort and energy need to be put in to buff that bitch to a high gloss shine. And even then you may buff out the surface before getting that sweet smooth finish. I say every idea is like an egg. Incubate and foster it and it may grow up to be that golden goose you’ve been looking for.

2. Nothing’s ever good enough

The evil twin of the first point, ‘nothing is ever good enough’ may come from a lack of confidence in oneself. Or maybe just a lack of persistence to see something through to the end. Early adopters of ideas have a difficult situation. Move from flower to flower as each new opportunity blooms, or stay on something until something better comes along. Well, that latter part is the persistence issue I’m talking about. In my younger days I was that guy. Doing the new cool thing until I found something “newer” and “cooler”, apparently. Never staying on one thing long enough to see it through. And when I did, I had too many things on my plate. Now I’m in my late 30s and STILL doing the same shit. Lucky for me life filled in a lot of the gaps so I only have limited space for the things I love. I now have a huge appreciation for those that play the long game to better hone their skills and deepen their interests.

3. Time is on your side

Oh, the creator and destroyer of everything. Managing time is key as one gets older. Life, as I’ve mentioned, fills in a lot of slots leaving the bare minimum of free choice – for the lot of us who don’t have exorbitant amounts of money – and it’s necessary to get your act together or you’ll be spinning wheels for a long time. And when you’re in your late 40s you look back and realize SOOOO much time had been wasted. I’ve learned to slow down and “make” time to do the things I like at no cost to my obligations. Family, friends, work, food, sleep, commuting (for some). These things munch up a lot of the 18 waking hours we have on the average week day. As I say to my 6 yr old son all the time, “sometimes you gotta do the things you don’t want to do to get to the things you do want to do. So eat your dinner. I don’t care if you don’t like it!” My parents channeling though me, I suppose.

4. Blast from the past

Ever had an idea for something you have been fiddling or fumbling with for some time, but then left it alone? Yeah. I’m like that ALL the time. More so with my creative story writing and board game designs. That hurdle you just can’t get past. Can’t seem to see the forest through the trees. It’s hard to realise something when you’re too close to recognise its use. Jumping from game idea to game idea works well for me because I’ve done it so naturally with a lot of other things in my life. Sleeping on it sometimes help. Refocus by no focusing at all also works. Sometimes those treasures lie in another box you haven’t opened yet. Moving around helps keep things moving, keeps the gears lubricated. I’ll usually burn hard and deep on an idea until I feel myself reaching and manipulating answers just to fill in gaps. Best to stop there. If it’s not intuitively or mathematically apparent then you might just be bogging up a good idea. Why be convoluted when you can be clear and concluded.

5. Leggo my Eggo, I mean Ego

That big balloon of gas we all call ego. Speaking to some I’ve heard that ego is ultimately a bad thing and not necessary for people to better themselves. I look at it as a supplement. Not like drugs or anything, but I guess you can relate it to that. A self esteem enhancer so to speak. A steroid. I understand the ego’s plight and we can all agree there is a fine line. The key is to stay humble while being close enough to that line that you can dabble in its head swelling greatness. ‘Everything is good’ so it’s on to the next pasture, even though it’s sometimes clear to everyone else this effort is half-assed at best. Toiling and tinkering away is not the egoists. Though one of the many facets of egoism is obsession. Well, that’s when good ole OCD comes out the play, but we’re not talking about that. Lack of ego groups you in point #2. Too much ego groups you with point #1. How does one balance the scales? Self reflection, honest feedback and accepting failure is a start. Failure is a catalyst to greater things, and a little humble pie does the body good.
I started this blog a month ago with a title and the first line. I had so much running through my head I wasn’t able to get it all out in words. As of this posting I sat for 20 mins and just dumped it all out in one go. No re-read, no skim and edit, no restructure. I wanted it to be a reflection of some of the things I’m sharing about myself and how I view my work ethic and creative process. A lecture based on self reflection. Excuse the grammatical hiccups I’m sure this post is laden with. Hopefully some of you might find a nugget or two of truth here and realise you’re not alone. Stop. Breathe. Play a video game. Hug someone you love. Eat, sleep, take a long hot shower. Then sit down at your place of creative expression and just let it all out. Feels good, doesn’t it? Cheers.